Note to the Weather

Dear Weather,
I have underestimated the power of plummeting water.

It is interesting to view human responses to spitting rain and snow. Here are a few of my observations:
-Some people have scowls on their faces as the wind drives itchy snowflakes into their eyeballs.
-Eyelashes only prevent 7% of snowflakes from entering your eyes.
-Many people walk under building overhangs or simply through buildings instead of around them, doing all they can to minimize their time spent under the gray sky.
-Calico cat finds shelter under the stone benches surrounding the SWKT, but would rather get wet running from bench to bench than let people get too close, even when they gently entreat, "Its OK kitty, come here!"
-People actually use umbrellas. This fascinated me. I think umbrellas are pretty useless. If you're planning on being exposed to the weather for a significant duration (say if you're hiking Mt. Humphreys during a monsoon thunderstorm), then sure, make some effort to stay dry. Wear a poncho. It's an incredibly unique experience as lightning dances in the sky around you. Fact: Plastic Ponchos predict lightning. Your poncho will begin to crackle as the static electricity in the air builds up, and will then stop crackling as 300 kilovolts of energy transfers from one cloud to another. To best experience this phenomenon, hang out above the tree-line on bare, exposed rock during a thunderstorm with your Boy Scout troop. Back to topic: If you're walking around campus, stop. Why would you walk in a circle?
-When people use umbrellas in densely populated areas, there are two significant negative results. Number One: pedestrian traffic is hindered, and available surface area for moving about is cut in half by every umbrella-wielding wuss. Seriously, have you ever considered how much space an umbrella takes up? I was walking around campus today and observed that already dense concentrations of pedestrians became even more congested because of huge space-consuming umbrellas. Number Two: People holding umbrellas pose significant risk to unarmed (unumbrella'd) persons. An umbrella has a minimum of 7 pointy metal edges positioned at eye level, directed outward at anyone and everyone. Scary!
-Some people genuinely enjoy rain and snow. I noticed several people with wet clothing and snow-capped hair smiling and enjoying the skydiving flakes striking them from above.




Jeremy will now add a few words.

kiwi, bodacious, green, pygmy. also, plethora.

-Travis "Thomas" Moore