One of my favorite authors is Orson Scott Card. He frequently writes about very young characters who do very extraordinary things.
We need not be small children to do extraordinary things. But you must be an infant in a sweet suit if you'd like to be referred to as "Iron Baby".
WOW.
-Travis
Iron Giant
Friday, May 28, 2010
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
He's Barack Obama!
Dear MASAPers,
Today I’d like to show you one of the coolest videos I think I’ve ever seen. I came across it and it basically made my day. So without further ado, I present “He’s Barack Obama” by JibJab:
In other news, Iron Man is now out of a job because Barack Obama pretty much took his place. He has now joined the rest of the world’s super heroes in retirement as there is no longer a need for any of them with Obama patrolling our skies.
In other news, I also came across this other music video shortly before the Barack Obama video. I hadn’t seen this one in several years, and I’d forgotten how hilarious it was. So here is another piece of entertainment for y’all, David Hasselhoff singing Hooked on a Feeling (My favorite part is probably his dance moves at 2:13):
Jeff Yeager
Mr. President. Barack Obama. Super Hero.
Friday, May 14, 2010
The Busey Challenge
Hello Masappers, this is not Jeremy Moore, nor is it Jeff Yeager, also not Michael Sylvestre or any other MASAP admin for that matter. This is the distinguished and impeccably humble Jacob Schmidt. I'm rather irked at two things right now, one is the lack of indentation and my complete inability to change that and the second is that I already typed a long newsletter just in time for my computer to delete it.
Blast! I love indenting, why do you not let me? The subject of this message is the new group and lifestyle known as the Busey Challenge. Some of you may have been invited, some may have been called squidbrain and others aren't lucky enough to know what I'm talking about, those very same people are also annoyed that I wont get around to telling them for at least three lines of type because I'm rambling and you're not my english teacher so I don;t have to listen to anything you tell mea bout comma splices and run on sentences or how I used a semi colon instead of an apostrophe when spelling the word don;t.
The Busey Challenge is a concept I started after seeing an interview with actor and self proclaimed prophet Garry Busey in which he threatened to pull the reporter's endocrine system out of his body and use it as a hat. I then challenged myself and a few others to use this threat in an ordinary situation. The idea took off and then expanded to a face book group that you can find and join today:The Busey Challenge I will be posting a new crazy quote to use each week and I will take any suggestions on other crazy people besides Gary Busey to feature.
That will be all except this video... and another one too.
Jacob Schmidt
-Busey enthusiast, squidbrain, and one man-wrecking crew
Blast! I love indenting, why do you not let me? The subject of this message is the new group and lifestyle known as the Busey Challenge. Some of you may have been invited, some may have been called squidbrain and others aren't lucky enough to know what I'm talking about, those very same people are also annoyed that I wont get around to telling them for at least three lines of type because I'm rambling and you're not my english teacher so I don;t have to listen to anything you tell mea bout comma splices and run on sentences or how I used a semi colon instead of an apostrophe when spelling the word don;t.
The Busey Challenge is a concept I started after seeing an interview with actor and self proclaimed prophet Garry Busey in which he threatened to pull the reporter's endocrine system out of his body and use it as a hat. I then challenged myself and a few others to use this threat in an ordinary situation. The idea took off and then expanded to a face book group that you can find and join today:
That will be all except this video... and another one too.
Jacob Schmidt
-Busey enthusiast, squidbrain, and one man-wrecking crew
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Flying!
Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute. ~Gil Stern
The Wright Brothers created the single greatest cultural force since the invention of writing. The airplane became the first World Wide Web, bringing people, languages, ideas, and values together. ~Bill Gates
Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste the sky as well as the earth. ~Henry David Thoreau
Think about flying--it's nuts really. Here you are at about 40,000 feet, screaming along at 700 miles an hour and you're sitting there drinking Diet Pepsi and eating peanuts. It just doesn't make any sense. ~David Letterman
I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on. ~Jean Kerr
I think it is a pity to lose the romantic side of flying and simply to accept it as a common means of transport.... ~Amy Johnson
My soul is in the sky. ~William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream
The reason angels can fly is because they take themselves lightly. ~G.K. Chesterton, "Orthodoxy"
I always thought that my airplane conveyed a silent sermon. To the earthbound observer, its silhouette was the shape of the cross on which Jesus was crucified. ~E.R. Trimble
There is just one thing I can promise you about the outer-space program - your tax-dollar will go further. ~Werner von Braun
Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know that, so it goes on flying anyway. ~Mary Kay Ash
The Wright Brothers created the single greatest cultural force since the invention of writing. The airplane became the first World Wide Web, bringing people, languages, ideas, and values together. ~Bill Gates
Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste the sky as well as the earth. ~Henry David Thoreau
Think about flying--it's nuts really. Here you are at about 40,000 feet, screaming along at 700 miles an hour and you're sitting there drinking Diet Pepsi and eating peanuts. It just doesn't make any sense. ~David Letterman
I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on. ~Jean Kerr
I think it is a pity to lose the romantic side of flying and simply to accept it as a common means of transport.... ~Amy Johnson
My soul is in the sky. ~William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night's Dream
The reason angels can fly is because they take themselves lightly. ~G.K. Chesterton, "Orthodoxy"
I always thought that my airplane conveyed a silent sermon. To the earthbound observer, its silhouette was the shape of the cross on which Jesus was crucified. ~E.R. Trimble
There is just one thing I can promise you about the outer-space program - your tax-dollar will go further. ~Werner von Braun
Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know that, so it goes on flying anyway. ~Mary Kay Ash
Flying
I did some flying this week.
"The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy has this to say on the subject of flying:
There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying.
The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Pick a nice day, it suggests, and try it.
The first part is easy.
All it requires is simply the ability to throw yourself forward with all your weight, and willingness not to mind that it's going to hurt.
That is, it's going to hurt if you fail to miss the ground.
Most people fail to miss the ground, and if they are really trying properly, the likelihood is that they will fail to miss it fairly hard.
Clearly, it is this second part, the missing, which presents the difficulties.
One problem is that you have to miss the ground accidentally. It's no good deliberately intending to miss the ground because you won't. You have to have your attention suddenly distracted by something else when you're halfway there, so that you are no longer thinking about falling, or about the ground, or about how much it's going to hurt if you fail to miss it.
It is notoriously difficult to prise your attention away from these three things during the split second you have at your disposal. Hence most people's failure, and their eventual disillusionment with this exhilarating and spectacular sport.
If, however, you are lucky enough to have your attention momentarily distracted at the crucial moment by, say, a gorgeous pair of legs (tentacles, pseudopodia, according to phyllum and/or personal inclination) or a bomb going off in your vicinity, or by suddenly spotting an extremely rare species of beetle crawling along a nearby twig, then in your astonishment you will miss the ground completely and remain bobbing just a few inches above it in what might seem to be a slightly foolish manner.
This is a moment for superb and delicate concentration.
Bob and float, float and bob.
Ignore all considerations of your own weight and simply let yourself waft higher.
Do not listen to what anybody says to you at this point because they are unlikely to say anything helpful.
They are most likely to say something along the lines of, 'Good God, you can't possibly be flying!'
It is vitally important not to believe them or they will suddenly be right.
Waft higher and higher.
Try a few swoops, gentle ones at first, then drift above the treetops breathing regularly.
DO NOT WAVE AT ANYBODY.
When you have done this a few times you will find the moment of distraction rapidly becomes easier and easier to achieve.
You will then learn all sorts of things about how to control your flight, your speed, your maneuverability, and the trick usually lies in not thinking too hard about whatever you want to do, but just allowing it to happen as if it was going to anyway.
You will also learn about how to land properly, which is something you will almost certainly mess up, and mess up badly, on your first attempt.
There are private flying clubs you can join which help you achieve the all-important moment of distraction. They hire people with surprising bodies or opinions to leap out from behind bushes and exhibit and/or explain them at the critical moments. Few genuine hitch-hikers will be able to afford to join these clubs, but some may be able to get temporary employment at them."
So what would distract you into flying? Leave your comments below.
-Travis Moore
Flying Squirrel
"The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy has this to say on the subject of flying:
There is an art, it says, or rather, a knack to flying.
The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
Pick a nice day, it suggests, and try it.
The first part is easy.
All it requires is simply the ability to throw yourself forward with all your weight, and willingness not to mind that it's going to hurt.
That is, it's going to hurt if you fail to miss the ground.
Most people fail to miss the ground, and if they are really trying properly, the likelihood is that they will fail to miss it fairly hard.
Clearly, it is this second part, the missing, which presents the difficulties.
One problem is that you have to miss the ground accidentally. It's no good deliberately intending to miss the ground because you won't. You have to have your attention suddenly distracted by something else when you're halfway there, so that you are no longer thinking about falling, or about the ground, or about how much it's going to hurt if you fail to miss it.
It is notoriously difficult to prise your attention away from these three things during the split second you have at your disposal. Hence most people's failure, and their eventual disillusionment with this exhilarating and spectacular sport.
If, however, you are lucky enough to have your attention momentarily distracted at the crucial moment by, say, a gorgeous pair of legs (tentacles, pseudopodia, according to phyllum and/or personal inclination) or a bomb going off in your vicinity, or by suddenly spotting an extremely rare species of beetle crawling along a nearby twig, then in your astonishment you will miss the ground completely and remain bobbing just a few inches above it in what might seem to be a slightly foolish manner.
This is a moment for superb and delicate concentration.
Bob and float, float and bob.
Ignore all considerations of your own weight and simply let yourself waft higher.
Do not listen to what anybody says to you at this point because they are unlikely to say anything helpful.
They are most likely to say something along the lines of, 'Good God, you can't possibly be flying!'
It is vitally important not to believe them or they will suddenly be right.
Waft higher and higher.
Try a few swoops, gentle ones at first, then drift above the treetops breathing regularly.
DO NOT WAVE AT ANYBODY.
When you have done this a few times you will find the moment of distraction rapidly becomes easier and easier to achieve.
You will then learn all sorts of things about how to control your flight, your speed, your maneuverability, and the trick usually lies in not thinking too hard about whatever you want to do, but just allowing it to happen as if it was going to anyway.
You will also learn about how to land properly, which is something you will almost certainly mess up, and mess up badly, on your first attempt.
There are private flying clubs you can join which help you achieve the all-important moment of distraction. They hire people with surprising bodies or opinions to leap out from behind bushes and exhibit and/or explain them at the critical moments. Few genuine hitch-hikers will be able to afford to join these clubs, but some may be able to get temporary employment at them."
So what would distract you into flying? Leave your comments below.
-Travis Moore
Flying Squirrel
Monday, May 3, 2010
Summertime!
Ramblings of a Relieved Student
For those who don’t know, I am now on vacation. I am terribly sorry that I have neglected all of you wonderful MASAPers these last few weeks. Finals are over and life can now be happy again! J One of the happy things in my life is watching my most favoritest TV show ever…Glee. I am so happy that others share in my enthusiasm and are even willing to show this in a public display of random dancing. I cannot tell you all how proud I am of my old hometown and how incredibly jealous I am that I was not there for this event. Please enjoy the following video and keep a watch out for the man in the blue shirt on his Bluetooth…he’s my favorite!
Well, I am off to enjoy the sun and my newly regained freedom!! Hope you all do the same.
Becka Wiser
Vice President. Also sun-soaking enthusiast.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Dora Impersonation!
There has been an important occurrence in recent days. It seems that someone has decided to try and imitate our beloved Dora the Explorer. This is an absolute mockery to Dora and her little friend Boots. We need to stand up for them and fight against this cheap imitation. Some people even mistake it for Dora, which is absolutely preposterous. I just want to encourage each of you to not fall for it. To help you recognize the difference between Dora and her imitation, I’ve included a video clip from the imitation so that you can learn to recognize and avoid it at all costs!
Jeff Yeager
Mr. President. Penguin lover.
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